For Leonard

(September 19, 2011)
Ha ha and Christian, it is perhaps a very good thing that you never respond with "Thank you, Kristen, you're correct! I'll do what you say knowing it will solve all of my problems," because if you were to do so, I'm fairly certain that the news would be such an enormous shock to my system that I'd die of a heart attack right there on the spot. And it would be completely and totally dreadful for me to make you spend the rest of your life in paralyzing guilt that way.

I'm still genuinely irked that you thought I like Chase. Don't turn that into a "the lady doth protest too much" tenet of your rebuttal. I wouldn't be able to take that boy anywhere, he's too crazy. And much as I think of him, and much as we are rather alike in a number of ways, I also....am not particularly into him. Besides, he and I actually get along. And we all know that if there's any real commonality between me and some boy, I will find a way to write it off before it begins, because I love getting in my own way just that much.

The BYU-Utah game was last night. I hope nobody else tells you about that. Most depressing sports event of my life. And I do not care about sports, either. I don't suppose you remember that line in Harry Potter (I'm fairly certain that it's the fifth, possibly the sixth) when Harry isn't able to play, and Ron's keeping, and Hermione keeps huffing that it's "just a game" and doesn't know why everyone's all worked up about it? And it's noted that while Harry would never admit this to Hermione, he'd give a great deal to consider Quidditch as nothing more than a game? That went through my head many many times while watching the game. It was dreadful. There were some plays in there that were worse than any football I've ever seen in my entire life, and I attended Brighton for perhaps the bleakest three years in its football-playing history. The high point was in the first minute of the game, in which we fumbled the ball into the end zone, attempted to retrieve it and on the pass, threw it backwards into said end zone where it was recovered by Utah for their first touchdown of the game my gosh boys really I'm dying a dreadful, decaying death inside at the horrors of that play. And while that was unquestionably, the most abysmal moment on our part during the game (single moment, anyhow), it was by a far more narrow margin than has any right to be in college football. Sigh. Did I mention that that was the very first BYU sporting event I've attended ever? Yup, I was there. The most enjoyable parts of that evening were, in order: seeing Jimmer (please tell me you know who Jimmer is.) come in, spotting Emily on Crimson Line, and seeing Niki Taylor on Utah Cheer. Seriously. Best parts of the game.