Craziness.

(December 11, 2011)
Welcome to finals Sunday!!

I'm going to sum that up for you in one word.

Resigned.

(Be prepared for me to totally break that one word promise below.)

Also, finals: I'm terrified. That unfortunate version of terrified that paralyzes you from putting forth a solid effort because the very idea is frightening, even though you realize that said paralysis is guaranteed to fail you. Sigh. This semester is just exhausting. I'm so very excited to be done. And I've been so thoroughly beaten down and ruined by it that I can't bring myself to care if I do poorly (Read: get something in the B+ range for more than one class). I'll still study, of course, and try to do my very best, but heaven knows. I got a 64% on the multiple choice of the Organic Chemistry midterm I took on the last day of classes. Felt like: the most prepared I'd been for an o-chem test all semester. Was: the worst grade I've gotten on an o-chem test this semester by a hefty amount. Frick, that's when the universe just mocks me for thinking I know stuff.

Can I just tell you: I've learned one and only one thing this semester.

I'm stupid.

K, not really. Somewhat said that because I'd really appreciate you contradicting me. But it feels true. I'm so unintelligent.....Blahhhhhhhhhhhhfhkljlkjl;ssaaqwwwww.

Haha, but funny stories from today:

First of all, I'm music co-chair in this ward. Think I've told you this. Anyway. Last week, my other half comes up to tell me that the bishopric has just informed him that we are to put together a Christmas musical program. For today. One week. REally, guys? Ha, so he says, we need musical numbers. I say that I could possibly do something, if necessary. I'm never really asked again about this offer, but my co-chair does ask me to accompany him. I figure that this will suffice for me sharing my talents and don't bother to really look into finding music options for myself.
Welcome to today, ten minutes into sacrament meeting.
Kristen looks at the program:
Special Musical Numbers -
Random guy
Kristen Nicholes
Ward Co-chair
Ha ha Worst surprise ever.

So, I run down to co-chair, and tell him that I'm finding someone to conduct the sacrament hymn and we're asking someone else to play it so that he and I can escape these respective duties in order to practice an impromptu Christmas hymn that he's going to play while I sing.

Two run-throughs of "Oh Come, All Ye Faithful" later, I'm standing in front of my entire congregation shaking like an umbrella in a hurricane and singing a song that I did not know I would be singing ten minutes prior.

It was not particularly good. But could have been worse. And Grant told me I did a good job, so...life will go on.

Also, I just returned from playing the Ty song (lyrics I sent to you, if you'd forgotten) to Ty himself. Hahahahahahaha. HILARIOUS. He was actually surprisingly non-awkward about it. To be fair, I pretended to forget the lyrics for the part that originally said "sack up and take me out" but otherwise I genuinely sang the whole thing. And nobody died. Bahaha.