September 2, 2012

Oh, I should so be doing my Pearl of Great Price Homework right now.  See, I just kind of attempted to do it (and completed one of two worksheets, so kudos to me), but definitely bought the wrong packet of readings - Doctrine and Covenants instead of Pearl of Great Price.  Fail.  Whatever, so that's going to have to wait until Tuesday, when I can buy the right one.  

Also, I'm attempting to write this while watching Megamind.  Inadvisable. Have you missed that one?  I think you have...I don't remember...Grand Dreamworks animated film. Focuses on a really crappy supervillian with a heart of gold and his arch-nemesis with a giant chin and great hair.   Voiced by Will Ferrell, Tina Fey, Brad Pitt, David Cross and totally hilarious.  You'll have to see it when you get back if you didn't catch it on the way out.  Of course, following your immediate and undoubtedly repeated viewings of HP 7.1 and 7.2. 

First week of school.  I love school.  I'm such a sick person.  I forget how insanely exciting is the first week of school - I was practically vibrating with happy energy all of Monday.  Classes seem like they will, at the very least, be a lot easier than last fall semester.  Perhaps even an improvement upon Winter and Spring Semesters :)  I kind of love my classes, and my favorite professor - who was supposed to retire, but got roped into one last class - is teaching one of my classes.  I'm excited.  Do you ever feel like some things are promising because they remind you of other really awesome times in your life?  This feels like the beginning of my fall semester sophomore year.  Most auspicious :)

Hahaha the other thing about first semester of school, however, is that Chris is back in my presence on a regular basis.  

Dahahahahhaa.  

First of all, he was good enough to shave his head.  Well, buzz, if we're being fair.  Regardless, he looks nothing like himself.  That's convenient for me.  It's really difficult to do that stupid thing where you reminisce while creepily staring at someone when their head stares back.

[Interruption of regularly scheduled programming to inform you that I just saw a picture of Gandalf with Morgan Freeman's face captioned "Gandalf the Black."]

Also, his girlfriend is a civil engineer (too lazy to check if I already told you that), so I've seen them wandering around the engineering building together.  So marvelously, hilariously awkward.  The way we determinedly avoid eye contact on these occasions is a work of art.  I've decided that awkward totally improves my life.  Awkward is magnificent.  It's hysterical.  90% of my dating stories would stop being funny if awkward weren't a significant part of them.  

Eh, and at least Spencer is off being good with someone else's family now :)  The girl he's marrying is, like, ridiculously beautiful.  She's all giant slanty blue-green eyes and lots of dark wavy hair and some deeply enviable clothes. As long as we're talking about how strangely my mind works, I will confess some weird depression upon seeing her.  I don't miss Spencer (although he's absolutely a wonderful person), but there's nevertheless something unsettling in feeling that you threw away someone who subsequently proceeded to procure an upgrade on you.  

Actually, I could go on for a while about my thoughts on being around people who knew me at specific parts in my life, and how I prefer to avoid people who are connected to certain eras. 

 The reason I have more thoughts to share on this subject: I was surprised to find people in my current ward - boys - who lived in my freshman ward and remembered me.  Was also surprised to find some level of discomfort with that fact. Not their presence - I rather like both of them, actually.  Honestly, I think I weirdly expect people like, not to recognize me if they last saw me during a completely different phase of my life.  Granted, this desire for shock and awe is a little more justified in their case, as I was all chubby with hair about ten inches shorter and practically black the last time they saw me, but still.  This really strange thing happened freshman year...it's like I was moving on a trajectory following high school, completely changed course freshman year, and then went in an altogether new one for the rest of my college experience.  I wasnot. happy. for so much of freshman year, which is a greater contrast to how I am now than the way I look.  I suppose I want people's jaws to drop at how different I am, even if they have no hope of seeing the true depth of my transformation.  And, it must be said, sometimes I vainly just want them to be like, "hey, weird, that girl's actually sort of hot now.  Who knew." 

August 27, 2012

La, la la la, la la.  That reads a lot more entertaining than it did in my head.  So this evening, I finally moved into my gloriously beautiful new apartment.  And it's really every bit as awesome as I'd expected it to be.  My room is giant, compared to many I've had before, and everything else is lovely.  Extra bonus: all the girls here are awesome.  No reservations, they are grand.  I'm going to enjoy this year.  Ha, especially as one of my roommates happens to cook, quite a bit.  But, she says, mostly desserts for her roommates.  Mwahahahahahahaha I have hit the jackpot of places to live.

This week was one of the fastest that has ever passed in my entire life.  I could swear that I was just sitting and typing to you from Lake Chelan.  The week in Chelan and Seattle was marvelous, though.  La.  

So, in Chelan, we first took the ferry up the lake (it's fifty miles long, so I read yet another book on the ferry ride there and back) to a town called Stehekin, which can only be accessed by boat.  It's small, quaint, piney, and perfect.  Oh, my.  It's really quite a stunning place, Washington.  I can't imagine anyone going there and not falling hopelessly in love.  Unless, of course, they lack a soul or similarly crucial element of humanity.  We hiked around Stehekin and got too much pastry and salad and chicken-bacon-feta confections (yeah, that thing was one of the best I've ever tasted) at the local bakery.  Serious.  It's so pretty.  Then Heather and I played around in the lake all day Tuesday, and commented on how we essentially act like ten-year-olds when we're together.  Hahaha.  We got out goggles - which will always make all human beings look like enormous dorks - and dove for rings in the shallow (read: between six and twelve feet deep) place behind the dock, we took turns leaping into the lake into the most exotic fashions we could and did some Olympic gymnast presenting for our dives, because that just seemed necessary.  We painted our toenails on the dock, I threatened to shove her in (and should have, it would have been funny) when she was being a pansy about how cold the water was, and really, it was just awesome.  We then proceeded to take the jet skis out, and Heather let me drive.  

Mwahaha.  

I'm rather more reckless on jet-skis than any other motorized vehicle, and it's really easy to make Heather freak out.  Well, not really, but she squeals loudly, which is entertaining.  I was flipping lots of donuts and seeing how fast I dared crank it to and generally being entertaining.  At some point in there, I started singing Call Me, Maybe.  I really don't know why.  In a magnificent moment that was criminally not preserved for posterity, I was singing at the top of my lungs while turning into a rather hastily accelerated donut, and somewhere in the middle of "Before you came into my life, I-", we were forcibly thrown from the jet-ski, head over life jacket, in what I'm fairly certain is one of the most entertaining moments of my life.  

There was also a really long political discussion amongst my family, as Dan posted a picture of him with Paul Ryan and Mitt Romney on the facebook page for his barefoot shoe company, and got plenty of seriously negative backlash. The people who were respectful enough to write things such as "You can support whoever you like, and I will choose to use my money elsewhere," have my full support.  I'm totally on board with that.  It's the people who were full of, "the founder is a brain dead tool," "moron," "hates women and should be ashamed of himself" with whom I take umbrage.  Dude, where is it written that disagreeing without vitriol is not allowed in politics?  I hate that attitude.  Disagree like a grownup, and for heaven's sake, stop extrapolating to the lowest common denominator.  Come on.  

"Tell me, Kristen - what is it you want in life and how do you see yourself?"

Let's reverse these, because that's more fun.  And this is going to be some very very candid things from me, which in this case means it's going to sound arrogant.  Bear with me.  

How do I see myself...I see myself as someone who loves, above all else.  Imperfectly, unfortunately, but still.  And we're not just talking about people. Quotes from Chris, "It's kind of hilarious, really, you love...like...everything.  Music, movies, people, food, nature, driving, anything.  You love it all."  I will maintain until the end of time that I'm happier because so much makes me happy.  The more people you love, the more people in your life who make you happy.  Ditto everything else.  

As for the rest, I could quite narcissistically go on about myself for ages at a time, but I'll be brief.  I feel like I'm an unusual combination of a lot of things. I'm driven, sarcastic, musical, tough, and have a strong religious center.  I'm content being single, have incredible friends, crack plenty of jokes - witty and off-color alike, enjoy biting off a snappy comeback with a smile, am occasionally wise, and have been told by a remarkable number of friends and family this summer that I can be counted upon to make smart, well-reasoned decisions. 

There's a line in that Carrie Underwood song, from the Enchanted soundtrack - "you just might wind up being glad to be you."  

Quite honestly, the first time I really listened to that line sometime in high school, I cried.  Because I frankly couldn't imagine what that was like.  However, the arrogance that I've been cultivating since you've been gone has come with a sense of appreciation for who I am.  I regularly feel like the luckiest girl in the world.  It's hard to imagine people having it much better than me.  Life is not a contest, and there are plenty of people prettier, smarter, wittier, more talented, whathaveyou.  In the last two years, however, I've found a magical ability to see other people with their talents so clearly outshining mine and still be very, very happy about who I am (usually).  Indeed, to know that I'm exactly who I'm supposed to be, having exactly the experiences I'm supposed to have.  There's a contentment that wasn't here before.  

What do I want from life...  I want other people to feel that contentment and happiness that I feel.  I want to help people reach their potential, because in exploring my own, I've already been astounded at what I'm capable of.  In a year, I'll have a diploma in chemical engineering.  I can't tell you how insane it is to know that I pulled through this, and even acquitted myself well in so doing.  I want to help people be happy like I'm happy, to be happy because they are capable of unlocking their own greatness, and in turn, to help others.  

Up to proofread, down to bed :)

August 20, 2012

Oh, my good, glorious, paradise.  Have I told you about Lake Chelan?  I'm sure, I can't resist gushing about it to people when I get the chance.   Lake Chelan: eastern Washington state, composed of glacial runoff that is icy cold but so window clear you can see straight to the bottom in thirty feet of water.  Where we stay in Lake Chelan is spectacular. Heather's in-laws  own this place right on the lake which was recently renovated. It's a small grey shingled affair with a red door that kind of feels as though you stepped into Nantucket.  There's a big old dock with jet skis and a super nice boat out back - Dan, Heather's husband, ran a wakeboard school from this very dock for several summers both before and after his mission, and consequently has mad wakeboard skills.  It's really enjoyable to watch him do ridiculous things.  The house has a state-of-the-art kitchen and is perhaps exclusively furnished in aggressively tasteful antiques.  That are strangely not twee, actually, which you might expect.  The house is gorgeous, the wrap-around porch is spectacular, and the view of the lake and surrounding town is unbeatable.  

So basically, my life is perfect.  You should be incredibly jealous.  Here's how I've spent my evening - Heather and I went to a farmer's market, where we fed the goats (which are kind of freaking adorable, and that's not as weird as it sounds) and bought sugar cane root beer and blueberries, cherries, and peaches rather larger than my fist and hooooooly crap, they're amazing.  Then we grilled lemon garlic chicken and corn on the cob, ate said fantasticness, Hez and I watched So You Think You Can Dance, we all made peach cobbler together while listening to Tony Bennet and Frank Sinatra and Michael Buble, and then ate said peach cobbler (again, freaking tasty) and Heather and I went and sat in the hot tub and had a crazy long conversation about the mysteries of life.  

You don't care, and I don't care that you don't, you get to read how awesome life is anyway.  

That conversation with Heather was really grand, too, by the way.  Sometimes, I can be helpful in dispensing advice.  This pleases me on the rare occasions that it manages to happen.  Although, a disturbing amount of times tonight, I sounded like a swallowed a fortune cookie.  Or a really lame self-help book. Heather and I are strong where the other is not.  Heather is selfless and humble where I am selfish and conceited.  I am confident in my own worth and assured of who I am where Heather second-guesses herself.  It really is completely perfect that we're sisters.  I was thinking, too, about how amazing are the people that my siblings married - every last one of them.  I love that I have two new sisters and an older brother, all of whom I respect enormously and love, all in their own rights.  

Related on multiple fronts: Cara, Nate's wife and I were talking when I was in Baltimore the other week.  I simply adore Cara.  She is down-to-earth, unassuming, happy, and loving.  Oh, my gosh, I love her.  [Let's be honest, who'd expect any less awesome a spouse from my this-close-to-perfect brother.]  They got married in 2010, and the first time she met me was at high school graduation. I was saying something to Cara, last week, about how I felt like I had changed enormously since coming to college.  She agreed wholeheartedly, "Honestly, I feel like you're...practically a different person, at least from the one I remember.  You...I don't want to say you're a lot calmer, exactly....But you found out what you wanted to do, and I feel like that grounded you, and centered you.  It's obvious that you have far more of a sense of self, and of what you want and who you are."

I've been reading more in the last few days than I have in (quite possibly) years :)  Mmmm, glory.  I reread HP 7 on Thursday, read an entire book called Fated on the drive up, and have since read the first Stieg Larssen novel.  You have to have heard of Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.  There is absolutely no way that you're running around Scandanavia, even under cover of a white shirt and black tag, and escaped the pull of that one.  It's good.  Excellent, on a lot of fronts, including literarily (although I will never pretend to be a true judge.  Especially as Google informs me that I just made up literarily).  Graphic, though, definitely.  My brain was a bit mired in strange Swedish impassiveness after finishing it.  

"Fresh off the GRE test as you will be when you read this, I'm sure your superior brain powers will understand what I'm saying beyond my ability to write it. "

Ha.  Hahaha.  hahahahhahahahahhahahaha.  That's sweet.  My brain was essentially deep-fried for all the use I got out of it for the rest of that day.  

"You know, someday I'm going to end up with diabetes, and will be relying on your very successful brother to save my life, and you'll stop him from ending my suffering as retribution for all of the times I've mocked your sciencyness."

If I were feeling obnoxious, I'd inform you that my brother is studying Type 1 diabetes, which you are born with, whereas the type you can develop is Type II.  

August 12, 2012

I can't stop singing "You're So Vain." That is an insanely catchy song.  And I'm singing it because I have my dad's laptop this week, and scoping through his music is an entertaining, if extremely vintage, experience.  This week is so enjoyable.  Mwahaha.  See, the Colony, where I lived this summer, made us all move out August 11.  All other housing contracts for fall begin around August 20.  So, translation - I was really concerned about having to commute down from Salt Lake, like, every day this week so I could go to work and take the GRE (tomorrow.  Morning.  Gah.) But luckily, one of my wonderful and yet mildly crazy friends down here is out of town until this Friday (at which point I'm leaving for Seattle for a week anyway), so I get to stay in her completely empty and very nice apartment  all week long.  My life is glorious.  Seriously, it's so cool to have a place all to myself.  I can do stupid things and walk around in whatever state I feel like and NO ONE is going to interrupt me.  I can play music insanely loudly, I can play my guitar forever.  

You know, Provo really is very pretty.  This girl's room has a gorgeous view of Y mountain and Rock Canyon.  Okay, amendment, Provo itself isn't particularly pretty, but the surrounding mountains are stunning.  Seriously.  I can't tell you the number of times (it may be every year, sometime in February or March when the snow absolutely refuses to go away and I'm drowning in school work) that I look up at Timpanogos, covered in snow and shrouded in pink or purple bits of cloud around sunset, and decide that Provo is worth inhabiting just for that view.

Speaking of inhabiting Provo, I had such high hopes for never getting in trouble with University Parking enforcement (Satan's Provo Cavalry in silver Jeeps).  But then, yesterday, I woke up to a boot on my car, because I'm staying in aforementioned friends house and it's basically impossible to park most places if you don't live there.  Stupid.  But meh, it really wasn't that bad.  I would have appreciated having those fifty dollars back to spend on something else, but....whatever. 

Hahahaa, I also found myself rereading through old facebook conversations the other day, because I got bored.  No one should want to associate with, much less date, someone who finds themselves as stupidly funny as I do.  I legitimately started a word document of all the funniest things I said.  In my opinion.  

Samplers: 

"Waking up in the morning can be a challenge
The enormity of both my greatness and my head are difficult to lift from my pillow."

Me: Oh, you're making assumptions about me, now? Unsurprising.  If unwise.  

Him:  Ha, the funny thing is that I was totally about to call that you'd say something like that.  

Me: potato.  Now stop being so cocky.

Speaking of other funny things you'll appreciate, quotes from Winnie:  "God wrote the bible.  Satan wrote the LSAT."

Hmm, what else.  Oh, funny, weird story.  So, there's this kid from a few months ago that I'm fairly certain I never mentioned (except perhaps in saying things like, "Woo, I have a date this weekend," or similar).He's in Tau Beta Pi presidency with me, and he asked me out early on, and I wasn't particularly into it.  I tried to give him a no, but he insisted that we at least get to know each other, and he would just happen to pay for dinner to facilitate that.  I caved, even though I didn't see it being super likely, but hey, I told him what I thought, and if he wanted to throw money at me anyway, I was definitely not going to stop him.  We went on three dates, between which, I discussed with him the fact that I would be sure to tell him the second I felt like it really wasn't going to happen - we both agreed that that would be a fair course of action.  Haha.  Somewhat hilariously, I began a text conversation after our third date with something like, "Hey, you wanted me to tell you when I was sure..."

and he jumped in immediately with, "Ha, hey, guess what, I'm really not feeling this!"

Bahahaahahaha and even though it seemed fairly convenient, I did believe him.  He and I get along, but there's no real spark.  I don't think.  

Which is why this last week is so strange.  We hung out twice - once, to see Dark Knight Rises (ha, not the first time for either of us) and ride his motorcycle, and once to just eat food and talk.  This second time, we stayed up until two-thirty talking on the couch.  But both times, there was this weird....weird, weird tension.  Christian, it's so bizarre.  Perhaps I'm just crazy.  But I swear to you - I don't like this kid, not like that.  I have no desire to kiss him, and I'm fairly certain that he has none of the same for me.  But there was this distinctively palpable sexual tension when we went to the movie and the other night.  At the movie, he lingered a little in examining my bracelets, pulled me a little closer than necessary on the bike (on the pretext, or perhaps for the actual purpose of making me less cold - dude, going sixty five miles an hour in the wind when you're wearing short shorts and a tee is frigid, regardless of ambient temperature).  Then, when we were talking on the couch, we were sitting way, way closer than was necessary, his hand on my knee (that said me knee originally, bahahah) and occasionally MOVING it. 

Knee tracing is so much more a big deal than simply having your hand on someone's person.  The latter can be an accident, it can be for convenience, it can simply be comfortable.  The former, however...The former is deliberate.  So that was weird.  

Oh, and before you cry foul and say that he's obviously still into me or similar nonsense, we discussed his girl situations all night long.  With a few of my stories thrown in for color, but mostly just, "Oh, what about this girl, this happened with her, do you think I have a chance?"  

The kid does value my opinion a lot, so that's flattering.  

Ha, I don't need to prove cause and effect on marriage and boring.  I just feel like being single sounds like so much more fun.  It's funny, Winnie and I were talking about this this week. Yeah, we want to get married, and it's what we expect to happen at some point down the line.  However, we can both say that we don't really have a problem with the concept of living on our own for the rest of our lives.  As long as you have friends, family, people who care about you....As long as you really do have people in your life to love and support you, it's really not bad at all to be single.  Seriously.  

August 5, 2012

Forgive me for mentioning your life and my lazy summer in the same breath.  I should have thought more that it would sound like I was saying you're not doing anything.  I realize that life is stressful, but enjoy stuff that isn't school stress while you can.  Maybe it's just me who glories in having things that aren't papers and tests and homework to worry about.  It seems like everything else matters less that school.  Obviously, the church is a different story.  But even so, the gospel seems so much harder to mess up in a gigantic way than does school.  Can I explain that?  Nah, not really, it's late and I'd undoubtedly do an abysmal job.

Thinking I'm funny may legitimately kill me one day.  It would have already if my self-entertainment extended to feats of physical comedy.  

Being in Maryland has been lovely.  My nephew is so freaking cute, man.  It's ridiculous.  He talks so much.  He's only two, but he always speaks in full, very articulate sentences.  He's going to be a freaking smart kid, and he's already a crazy smart toddler.  Haha he loves people so much, too.  Samples of our conversations:

Brecken:  I like your blue eyes!

Kristen:  I like your brown eyes!

Brecken: Hahahaha I like my brown eyes, too.  

Brecken:  Ha Ha Ha Kristen, you're funny!!

Brecken (seriously, not making this up): Kristen, look at the excavators digging in the fields!

Brecken:  Oh, I like this book, it's interesting!  

He's hilarious.  And adorable.  And freaking does not listen to me at all, because is well aware that I have no jurisdiction whatsoever.  But still.  Love him.  He likes it when I read things to him, and make up more voices than I knew I was capable of for all of his stuffed animals.  

My niece is also adorable.  She's just sweet and happy.  She's Nate's daughter (Brecken belongs to Dustin, whose wife, Carrie, is pregnant with a little girl) and I'm at Nate's tonight, having spent most of the week with Dustin and Carrie.  I get to see Nate's lab at Hopkins tomorrow and I'm sooooo excited.  

July 16, 2012

I just read an article on the history of mooning, and reflected that this is one of many reasons I'm happy to live in the information age - even stupid and yet strangely fascinating information such as that, at my fingertips.  Lovely.  

 Apparently, Chris really didn't know if we were officially broken up or not, and so just waited a few days to see if I'd text him, and when I didn't, concluded that we had, in fact, broken up.

My friend Heather was dating a guy for about six months, they broke up in January.  A week later, he started dating a girl who'd broken off an engagement herself in the past week. Then they got engaged a month later.  
These things work for some people, they really do.  I still find it fascinating that this got to happen, though, because if any of the above were key points in one of my relationships, my mom would lock me up and declare that I was not leaving until I agreed with her that I was acting crazeh.  

As for other things.  Haha, I got back together with and broke up with Chris this week.  And had some really good support for my rule about not talking to exes for a while after you break up :P  

To the recounting of tales!
(Don't ask where that came from, I really have no idea and it's weird.)

We missed each other, started texting on Monday, and I finally just threw caution to the winds and told him that I wanted to see him.  So we saw each other, hooked up again, and (kind of hilariously) as he was leaving that night, I grabbed him by the face and said, "Hey, you know that there's every possibility that I will wake up tomorrow and think that this was the worst idea ever, yes?  And there's just as legitimate a possibility that I will want us to get back together?"  
Chris: "I know.  But you're smart, you're rational, and you make good decisions.  I trusted your choice to break up, your decision to do this today, and wherever you decide to go from here, I trust your judgment.  I really do."  
Obviously, I felt like we should maybe give this another try.The second I told him, I had this immediate, very calm feeling that that was not a good decision.  
Haha to which I was like, "Er....but....I'll revisit that again, if this sticks around for a little."
It did, as a matter of fact, I just kept feeling really strongly  that it was not a good idea.

So I knew what I had to do, and really, really didn't want to - this back-to-Chris experience really only let me know more how much good there was in that relationship.  And subsequently remind me that I had to chuck it.  Things that suck...
 
But bahaha, please enjoy the tale of the world's weirdest break up with me.  

I told him exactly how I felt, and he said again that he trusted my judgment, even in this case.  

We then spent the next three hours on my couch joking and being stupid and telling each other all the things we'd appreciated about the relationship and each other and how happy we were that we had that experience.  Extolled each others virtues at length and in great detail, and told each other what we'd miss about each other.  We told all of our lame inside jokes and talked about how we can't hook up and how I won't be texting him for a while, to prevent this happening again.  He made me promise not to hook up with stupid guys anymore, to which I responded that I couldn't even really see the appeal anymore.  

All of this was interspersed with comments on how this is absolutely the weirdest breakup that anyone ever had.  

July 9, 2012

 Legally Blonde is on in my hotel room.  She gets a flipping 179 on her LSAT.....that's kind of ridiculous.  Extremely.

Anyhow.  So you're old.  Hope you celebrated that acceptably.  I probably ate enough cake for both of us - I went to a wedding for a second cousin tonight near Valencia, California, and I'm there for another twenty-four hours.  This has been such a very strange week, I've been with some form of second cousin all week, and eating like three or four times the amount of food I should be.  Dang, I really have to be crazy good when I get home.  And go back to work....Boo...

More on my ridiculously great week later. 

Oh, gosh, and legally blonde is ridiculously distracting.  Good heavens, this is taking me forever.  

Continuing.  

Interesting.  I feel like I occasionally have serious disconnect from my emotions.  Kind of because I don't really remember the last time I felt desperately sad or completely, impossibly angry. As in, those were years ago.  I get twenty-four-hour displeasure or mild stress for a week or two, but I always know that things are going to work out, and therefore have trouble getting seriously depressed about things.  As for angry...I just don't really have an explanation for why I don't get pissed off to the same extent I used to be capable of.  Annoyance still happens, sometimes to an extent that worries me, but...dang, I used to be all mildly crazy and FEISTY, and I really can't explain what happened to that.

Ha, oh, as for Chris, the pretty much entire transcript of our actual breakup:

Kristen - We need to break up.

Chris [Levelly] - Okay.

Long pause, hug

Kristen, from somewhere around Chris's armpit - I want to say something kind of cliche.

Chris - Ha, hit me with it. 

Kristen - I'm sorry this is my fault.  

Chris - No, it's really not.  Good night.  

Kristen - Good night.

Did I mention that as I walked to the door, I had to ask myself if I thought Chris really understood that we had broken up?  Because that conversation was so fast and so simple that I couldn't be sure.  

On to my life, we had a family reunion this week, and I finally got to see my niece.  Oh, my niece.  Five months old, and she has eyes that look like Nate's and a good deal like mine when I was a baby and gigantic cheeks.  You know, as a child, I never understood that incredibly weird relative thing where they pinch your cheeks....I'm going to be that crazy aunt.  So worth it.  Oh, my, there is nothing like having a baby fall asleep on you.  I'd get her after loads of people had held her and she'd just put her head on my shoulder and crash.  Five seconds flat.  McKinley is the sweetest, happiest baby, and she smiles a ton, and I die over how cute she is and seriously, no one has cuter nieces and nephews than I do.  No one.  

My siblings and I all went out on the boat as well.  Oh, glory.  I suck at wakeboarding, have we canvassed this?  Dan was a wakeboard instructor, so he's actually been successful at getting me upright, but I do not stay that way.  Ever.  Embarrassing.  It was so much fun to be with my family, though.  Oh my, and my cousins....Bahahaha.  We play some freaking INVOLVED games of mafia.  Like each round is fifteen minutes of discussion, minimum, and most of us were over eighteen and very skilled at the game.  We played a few times with rounds of discussion on who people should vote to execute that lasted for forty-five minutes, an hour, and I cannot even tell you the amazing out loud psychoanalysis everyone was doing.  

We also play lots of scum.  I was king for several rounds.  Please hold your applause until I get to hear it in person.  

Let's see, what else, what else.....My life is lovely.  I don't want to go back to work on Tuesday.